Living alone and being lonely may feel like the same thing. To others it might look the same, but you and I know it isn’t. Being alone after a lifetime with a partner is never going to be the same. Never can be. We have all learned that every day we live is different, we all know nothing stays the same. Such is life – and the stuff of history.

Yesterday, it almost seems, I had a wife. A partner with whom I shared every facet of our lives together. Today, some years later, I have now learned to rejoice in the memories and have begun to embrace the day, today, rather than the yesterdays.

Of course, that journey together, with all its ups and downs over those sixty odd years, will never be forgotten. We were fortunate to have happy loving children and great-grandchildren, in whom all the facets of our married life are gently imprinted. The same, but different. That’s the bonus, the multiplication effect of happiness, which can never be entirely overshadowed by sadness, or time.

This road of aloneness is, for me, not so lonely as it was at first – although it does have its moments. Slowly, we all learn how the passage of time helps us to rebalance, to rebuild and reshape our now singular lives. My belief in a loving God, coupled with the love of our children and our friends, continues to maintain my sense of worth. That’s the antidote for depression which continues to provide strength as I try to rebalance my lopsided life.

So, my readers who are without a partner for whatever reason, take heart! Our lives do get turned upside down sometimes – nothing stays the same. We all need to take time out to restore our muddled minds and, although we can never be the same again, we all strive to find a new level of life, a new point of balance. I simply try to pace myself and accept that everything is always changing and to roll with punches! Sort of “go with the flow”, but in a different, more energising, way.

Life can never be the same as it was yesterday; nothing, except maybe love – and even that needs nurture. So, I guess we need to accept and rejoice in today, this present day, whether it’s the same or different; it’s the most certain thing we have!!