Living solo

Taking one day at time is fine, even a good idea, “sufficient unto the day”. All that sort of philosophy has its place. But living 24/7 alone, I find, is seldom easy, never even close to ideal. No way! My antidote is to get out and about, especially whilst I am still driving safely, visiting shut-in friends, most of whom are also now single, and some limited travelling, while I’m able!

In earlier times (and I mean my earlier times) single people and couples had, at best, only radio for company at home. Oh, and reading – newspapers and books were a delightful home pursuit. Also, especially for the ladies, mostly then homebodies, knitting, crochet and creative (?) cooking. The men also had their work, their pub, the wood to chop, and weekend sport. I recall a period, back in the early forties, when my estranged Mum and I went to live with my elderly uncle for a while.

Then, he had only a wood-fired stove for heating – and cooking! It was wartime, Uncle Sam’s wife had recently died, his only son was overseas fighting a war on foreign lands and my uncle was living, almost, in squalor. It was months before mum could establish a good home base for us all. Sam’s health at first was poor, exacerbated by his subsisting on a minimal diet, so we all benefitted by that move. I won’t go on about that wartime era because my older readers know it all so well. Those were certainly not the ‘good old days’ for many people, and perhaps even less so for those older folk, like Sam, living alone.

Anyway, back to my theme, living alone, today. Wow! That is so different. In this present era, one would think, with TV, dedicated support agencies, more affluence, and much higher standards of living, being alone should be a doddle. And, for the most part, and speaking about the physical aspects, that right, it’s a breeze. It’s the personal side that remains a challenge for many of us.

I am blessed with a loving, caring family who watch over me like guardian angels and they know how I love them. That should be enough, but with the best possible intentions, it’s not quite. The critical element of emotional support that many of we singles crave is often the missing piece, the intimacy of a constant partner at my side, a soulmate.

What’s the answer to this deficiency? Well, it depends, as any politician might say. Every person must find their own answer – or at least a version that suffices. Be assured (by humble me) that, with prayerful support, a satisfactory remedy is possible, if only partially. But living in the past is certainly not the solution. The best advice I can offer, as so many learned people have explained, is to live in the moment; to keep seeking to find the enjoyment of the here and now, in company or alone…….