I’m guessing that just about every one of my (older cohort) readers will know the stage and film versions of “The King and I” and the “Sound of Music” and will readily recall with pleasure some of the beautiful lyrics in almost all the songs that Julie Andrews and others made so famous. I’m not sure if it always works, but when I hear those songs my heart usually does a little pleasurable leap of delight as my mind connects the shared joy that Dorothy and I experienced in earlier times, maybe fifty or sixty years ago! What clever songwriters were Mr. R. Rogers and Mr. O. Hammerstein ll who, incidentally, were responsible for the music and lyrics in both shows and many others, too.

I don’t think it will infringe copyright for me to show you just a part of those lyrics so you can, perhaps, share the experience, the frisson, I get when I hear these songs. Like this:

Getting to know you, getting to know all about you.
Getting to like you, getting to hope you like me.
Getting to know you, putting it my way,
But nicely,
You are precisely,
My cup of tea.
Getting to know you,
Getting to feel free and easy
When I am with you,
Getting to know what to say
Haven’t you noticed
Suddenly I’m bright and breezy
Because of all the beautiful and new
Things I’m learning about you
Day by day.
Sharing your spirit,
Sharing your tears and your laughter
Hoping it goes on……

And, then there’s that other song from those prolific songwriters, this one from the “Sound of Music”, which also transports me to happier times….

When the dog bites, when the bee stings
When I’m feeling sad
I simply remember my favourite things
And then I don’t feel so bad…….

After visiting Dorothy yesterday, I am not sure whether my remembering those happy shared times and enjoying those songs has improved my current feelings – probably not!  As some of my readers know only too well, it really hits hard when your partner just doesn’t respond to your presence, and that’s how it was, yesterday. Theoretically we know, because of Alzheimer’s, our partner’s span of understanding is miniscule, and we know to expect the outcome of some of our encounters – but – it is so incredibly hard to accept that reality. I just couldn’t cope with that visit and left after twenty minutes or so. Then, after a little weep in the car before I settled down, had a quiet prayer, and drove quietly away. No matter how I rationalise, it remains as a constant sadness that wells up, sometimes when I am not expecting it, and can easily dominate most of my actions and thoughts; but it serves no purpose other than to feed on itself and, for that reason I continue to learn how to cope. Most days, I do that by my prayers and by walking and reading (newly rediscovered) and maintaining friendships and of course “getting on with it”, and not ‘moping’ or being a drudge when in company. Sometimes, it’s hard work, but I am determined to stay sane and to continue to visit Dorothy as often as currently possible in this coronavirus era!

Getting to know you also means “getting to know thyself” and not ‘living in the past! That’s easy, isn’t it?      And then I don’t feel so bad…….